Family Photos

The day after Thanksgiving our family all loaded up and headed to the mall for.....no, not Black Friday shopping......we went for family portraits! It was a busy, crazy day at the mall, and the portrait studio was packed! Luckily we had an appointment and our photographer was right on time. 

Though it was a little rushed and we did not have time to do a lot of different poses, we still managed to get some great pictures. It was a great gift to me (my Christmas present to myself) to have all my children together in one place and to have a picture taken. The only sadness to the day was that we had to hold a framed picture of Emily, instead of having her sweet little spirit here with us on Earth.  But we were able to include her by holding her photograph and she is always close to our hearts! 

So, without further words, here are some of our family pictures!  Hope you enjoy them!

From left to right, back row:  Josh (age 3), Katie (age 19), Andrew (age 23), Dana (age 22), and Sophie Faith (almost 1 yr)  Front row: Angela (me), Chrissy (age 11), Kevin (dad) and Stephen (age 10). I am holding a picture of our angel Emily (forever 4). 

I am so blessed with seven beautiful adopted children, now ranging in age from 23 years down to 1 year, and I am so happy to feel with certainty that my family is now complete. Sophie Faith is our last little addition and I thank my Heavenly Father for each and every one of my kids, as well as my beautiful daughter in law, Dana!  Though the sorrow of losing one of my precious little ones remains fresh and painful, I know in my heart that dear Emily played a part in bringing Joshua and especially little Sophie into our family. Her spirit remains strong and I feel her close to us on a daily basis, but most especially I feel her around Sophie. I believe she watches over her little sister and loves her very much. It is such a blessing to know that Heavenly Father allows Emily to participate in our family in such a special way from Heaven.
                     Emily, we love you and miss you so much!

It was quite a chore getting all the family up and dressed and loaded into wheelchairs and car seats and getting the whole crew up to the portrait studio, but it was so worth the effort!  Here are a few more.....

      








Hope you all have a blessed and happy Christmas! Love to all -  The Mason Family

Today is my precious boy, Joshua's birthday. He is three years old. And it marks one year since he came into our lives!  I made a slideshow to thank his Birth mom for allowing us the privilege of raising this beautiful, sweet, energetic, and very special little boy!  Thought you all might enjoy it!! 

Create a free digital slideshow

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

Raising Money For a Van and Lift!

It sucks having to raise money! I wish we were independently wealthy and could afford to just go out and buy what our family needs!  But, alas, like most Americans in today's economy, it takes most of what we have to make ends meet. I thank my Heavenly Father every day for the blessings he has given us. We are thankful that Kevin has a good job and can provide shelter, food, utilities, and all the necessities we need in life. We are thankful that the younger children qualify for Medicaid because of their disabilities, and due to that their medications and most of their medical equipment is paid for between the Medicaid and our private insurance!
But there are some things for us that are a necessity because of our lifestyle. Yes, it is a lifestyle we have chosen! We wouldn't trade it for all the riches in the world. Because we feel we have all the riches in the world - in the form of four darling children who are worth millions and millions!  But sometimes things come along that we are not able to provide for these precious little ones. It doesn't happen often. And when it does, I feel really bad, and usually we just make do or do without! NEVER have we gone the route of fundraising for our own family. It just isn't something we have needed or wanted to do.
But recently, with the rapid growth (unexpectedly) of our family, with the addition of Joshua (planned) and Sophie Faith (unplanned) we are faced with the fact that within the year, our sweet ride (haha) will no longer be adequate for our family's needs! We currently own a year 2000 Chevy custom van. It has a wheelchair lift and we have removed the captain's seats in the middle to put two sets of tie-downs in. With the tie-downs and the lift, we are able to put Chrissy and Stephen in the van in their wheelchairs without having to transfer them to seats and they ride in their chairs when we go anywhere. This is necessary now that the both of them are way too heavy to transfer back and forth between car seats and wheelchairs!  It has worked well for us for the last two years, and the van, though old, is still running pretty well! 
Now, Joshua has his own wheelchair on order, and is already using a trial one! So we are putting Chrissy and Stephen in at the tie-down locations, and lifting Josh out of his chair, storing it in the rear of the van, and letting him ride in his car seat. Sophie doesn't have a chair yet, so she rides in a car seat as well. The van doesn't have the new latch system, so the car seats are strapped in the old fashioned way on the bench seat at the rear of the van!. It works and we are doing okay for now.
But it occurred to me that soon this will no longer work! Within the next six months, Sophie will be ready for her own wheelchair. Like Chrissy, she will have a manual chair that has to be pushed by her caregivers. So it will be a larger, bulkier chair.  At that time, we will not have room in the rear of the van for both Josh's chair and Sophie's chair!  So we will have to take only two kids at a time or take two cars when we all need to go somewhere! If we take two cars, the minivan we own will not hold the larger wheelchairs either, so not sure how exactly we will manage the whole family going anywhere together farther than the few miles we travel to Church on Sundays! 
It is a daunting thought to figure out how to get a new van that is extended length and will hold all four chairs! I have started looking on ebay, but short of getting a wheelchair BUS I haven't seen much!  And I can't see myself driving a bus to Texas Children's Hospital or on family vacations!! LOL
So, what to do??  We have started saving our dollars, but it will take us quite a few years to save up cash for a new van!  We really don't want to put ourselves in major debt to buy one either. That doesn't help our family either!  We are trying to come up with ways to fund raise locally, so if anyone has good suggestions on that, please comment or let us know!! 
For now, for lack of other options, we started a fundraising campaign on Indiegogo website.  For those of you who have seen the recent stories on the bus monitor in New York who had money raised to send her on vacation, her campaign was started on Indiegogo! Last I heard, they had raised over $650,000.00 for her in a matter of days!!  Well, that got me thinking!  Now, we don't need $65,000.00 much less $650,000.00!!  We only need enough for the van (around $20,000) and the lift and tie-downs (around $10,000).  And we will be doing our own saving and scrimping for most of that!! BUT, I figured it probably couldn't hurt to reach out to friends and family and ask them to share our link for the fundraiser and see if we can't spread the word for help in getting the vehicle for the kids! 
Let me be clear on that - for those that we know and love who have special needs kids and/or are struggling themselves, PLEASE DO NOT DONATE!  We would never, ever want to impose on those we love who themselves have lots of needs in their lives!!  We appreciate you for just being there and supporting us in a thousand different ways as our friends and loved ones!! 
But if you have friends on your facebook, or have ways to spread the link to the fundraiser, feel free to share the link!!  Who knows, maybe we will get lucky and be able to raise at least half of what we need. That alone would ease our burden greatly!
SO here it is, the link to the fundraiser! I will only blog about this once, and only share the link once here and maybe a couple of times on my facebook page. Then we will leave it up to you to spread the link from there! If it doesn't go anywhere, then that is okay too. Whatever we raise will go into an account we are starting specifically for the purchase of the van and lift! We thank anybody that contributes or shares the link from the bottom of our hearts! 


Thanks everyone for lifting us up!!  In many ways and in your hearts!! Love you all!   

For Those Of You Who Believe You Could Lose Your Child Tomorrow and Still Be Who You Are Today

For Those Of You Who Believe You Could Lose Your Child Tomorrow and Still Be Who You Are Today

MOTHER'S DAY MEMORIES

Tomorrow is Mother's Day 2012. I have seven reasons to be a happy woman tomorrow!! I love being a mother, and love love love my sweet children! Andrew, Katie, Chrissy, Stephen, ^Emily^, Joshua and Sophia - you are the lights of my life and joy of my soul! I treasure every memory and every second of my life as your mother.

Some of those memories.....

Andrew, at age 2, on a family vacation to Ruidoso, New Mexico:   Me: Andrew we are going horseback riding tomorrow....   and about an  hour later Andrew: Daddy, we are going BACKHORSE riding! ... and never forgetting that spaghetti was "pasketti", and a refrigerator was a "fiderfator" or that his first word was "flower"! That he wanted to name his new little sister "Juice" before we got her, and then after she came home and had colic for a few days, he wanted to "take her back" and after he found out she was ours forever, he thought very seriously for a minute and then said "well.....can we just put her in the garbage then?"

Katie, at age 3, jumping up and down and up and down along with her big brother Andrew, singing the oompa loompa song in front of my video camera (still have that tape in case I need to blackmail the two of you) and somehow the song coming out as an endless repeat of oompa,oompa,oompa!  ....and never forgetting my sweet little three year old standing up in church at the children's primary meeting and singing "Jesus Loves Me" with her friend Rachel....so brave in front of the whole congregation!  Also remembering all the days and nights of having the privilege of watching her do gymnastics, tumbling, diving and cheerleading competitions - her athleticism is AMAZING! She makes me so proud!

Christina, at age 5 months, giving me her first beautiful laughter on Mother's Day 2001. The most precious gift ever! .....and never forgetting the sound of her sweet laughter, her sweet voice, and the most beautiful smile in the whole world meant just for me! She is still smiling that smile today, every day!!

Stephen, at age 18 months, pointing his finger at our nurse when she called his name and saying with great clarity "I BUSY!", like he couldn't be bothered with us! Such a little man he was, and still is.....never forgetting the time he overheard me talking on the phone about a blown transformer in the neighborhood, and he got really really quiet for about 20 minutes. Finally, I asked him what was wrong, and he whispered "Did you say there was a TRANSFORMER out there??"  ROFLOL, he thought it was a real transformer like from the movies! And boy, he was really worried!!

Emily, dear precious, angel Emily......so many memories of you, that both fill my soul with gladness  and crush my heart at the same time that you are no longer with me on this earth....never, ever forgetting combing your beautiful hair smelling of strawberries...your precious smile.....you eating chocolate until you fell asleep with it all over your face and hands....you riding on the back of Stephen's wheelchair while he hollered "get her off, get her off", even though he loved you being there.....and riding Space Mountain roller coaster with you giggling and giggling the whole ride.....so many memories, yet never enough of them!! Four years as your mother was not nearly long enough for me and I long every day to hold you in my arms and kiss your sweet cheeks!

 

Joshua, age two, sitting in his little ready racer go cart and figuring out he could roll it himself and boy did he ever take off!!  Hasn't stopped moving since!!  ....and never forgetting seeing your precious face the first time, with your little ng tube and such a somber little look on your face....how it has turned into the most beautific smiling happy little boy's face!  You have been with us 8 months now and I can't remember what it was like without you in our family!!  

Sophia, my baby girl....seeing her for the first time in the hospital!What an angel she was and is! .....never forgetting how we almost lost you to that shunt infection, and never more grateful in my life that Heavenly Father allowed you to stay! Waiting for my first genuine smile.....hoping you will follow in your big sister's footsteps and grace me with a smile and some laughter tomorrow on Mother's Day!! If not, I will just enjoy your cuddles!!

Just a smattering of things that come to mind when I think of my life with my children. Memories more precious than gold, brighter than any diamonds, and more valuable than a whole room full of jewels! 

I love you, my children. I am thankful to be a mother. I wouldn't trade it for any other occupation in the universe!!

I have entered Joshua in a contest to win a adapted bicycle!  Please visit the link below and vote for my little munchkin!!  Thanks!!

http://bit.ly/greatbikegiveaway

Vote for my girlies in the Spring Photo Contest!!

At the Global Hydranencephaly Foundation's facebook page, please click on the link. "Like" the Foundation page, and then "Like" the picture of my two Hydran lovies!! 
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.311712262227239.72716.240008756064257&type=1

Special Lessons For Special Families!!

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/special-lessons?lang=eng&media=video

The Four

Life is Good, just watching these four,

Am I selfish for wanting more?

Why is it that life just doesn't seem fair,

I am missing the one with the short dark hair!

Chrissy sits in the recliner,

the sun shining behind.

Lighting her profile

with peace sublime....

Sophia my Faith enjoying her swing

feeling warm and toasty,

her sweet little face, makes my heart sing....

Stephen is organizing his movies and games

He is such a sweet boy, so earnest and smart ,

I knew he was special, right from the start! 

Little Joshua plays on the couch,

His hands are always busy,

His smile at the ready,

His love and devotion always so steady.....

Up above the mantle, sits a portrait, so sweet .

She watches over us all, from high above,

My Emily, my Hope, my precious love.

I miss the one with the short, dark hair.

Her giggle, her laugh, her rambunctious air!

It gives me comfort to know that she watches,

from Heaven above.

Though my heart hurts and is often sore....

I am happy she watches over my Four!!  

 

March 2012

Happy Two Month Birthday, Feb 29, 2012 to sweet Sophia Faith!
March 2012, and she is still in the hospital. But she is holding her own and she is doing much better. We are slowly getting all her "problems"and accompanying "conditions" straightened out. She has Adrenal Insufficiency, Diabetes Insipidus, and still needs a new shunt. She just had g-tube surgery and a Nissen fundoplication on Friday. She will start pedialyte through her g-tube today and tomorrow will start regular feeds through her tube. With her fundoplication, we are hoping we have stopped the projectile vomiting she was having due to her reflux. The neurosurgery fellows and doctors have had a nice change of heart and are checking her daily for CSF pressure until her g-tube site heals and they feel safe in putting in her new shunt. She is getting a "tap" through her fontanel if her pressure builds too high, which is painless, easy and safe. They are drawing out about 50 cc of excess CSF fluid every other day. That is keeping her at a good level, with no pressure on her head. So she is much less irritable now and is just a little sweetheart.
She will communicate with me by cooing and soft cries when I talk to her. She is very opinionated, and will let the nurses and me know when she is displeased with something or wants some attention!

The plan now is to wait 10 days, until her g-tube/fundo site is healed well, and then the neurosurgeon will put her new shunt in. The stomach must be healed before they put the shunt tubing in, as it rests in her tummy as well, and they want no risk of an infection again.  I understand the caution!   Unfortunately, they will probably not let her come home in between her g-tube surgery and the shunt surgery, since they are having to monitor her CSF so closely. So we have to continue to be patient!  We are getting closer to bringing her home though! 

Meanwhile, everyone else is doing A-OK! Joshua is now pulling up on everything and is cruising around the furniture! What a sweet little man he is!  He is also talking up a storm and learning new words every day! He is growing in every way by leaps and bounds. We hope to have his adoption finalized by the beginning of April. One more post adoption supervisory visit and we should be ready to start filing adoption paperwork!

 Took Stephen and Joshua to the rodeo this week. Stephen was chosen to participate in the Lil Rustler's Rodeo by the Spina Bifida Association. He had a great time. He got to ride a horse, rope a "calf" (not a real one), play all kinds of games, and generally get lots of attention from the cowboys!  He got a hat, shirt, bandana and a belt buckle and a bunch of other little prizes. And we got to attend the Rodeo that night.  Josh was scared to death of the indoor fireworks at the Reliant Stadium! But both boys had a good time!

Chrissy is doing well. She has been a little congested and had a lot of sinus problems with all the changes in weather lately, But we have not had to take her to the doctor, only increase her breathing treatments and suctioning! She is such a sweet little girl, and remains happy all the time!  

We are definitely a blessed family, though very overwhelmed and busy at the moment. It is so hard when you have a child in the hospital long term. We are praying to get Sophia Faith home within the next month, so that our April will be a wonderful one!  Would love to have everyone home and healthy by April 1, 2012, and have two adoptions completed by the end of April!  

That is our goal!!! Keep us in prayers, that we can accomplish this soon!!!!   

Repeating Facebook Status on Blog.....

There is a group of women (and a few valiant men) that I am proud to call my friends. Most of them I have never met. The few I have met reaffirm my knowledge that this entire group of families are the best and most special people in the entire world! They are courageous, loving, kind, and brave. They are the parents and loved ones of our beautiful Hydranencephaly children. And our entire support group is suffering right now. We all love each other very much. Please keep the Global Hydranencephaly Family to Family Resource Group in your prayers this day and in the coming weeks. Our prayer list right now includes:
- The Nevil Family, who lost their precious daughter Savannah yesterday. The third child and second with Hydranencephaly they have lost in the last 16 months!
- The Brennan Family, who are sitting at the bedside of their precious daughter Holly, while she spends her last hours on earth.
- The Garcia Family, who stand vigil by their beautiful son, Andrew, who will also be joining the angels sometime today.
- The King Family, who suffered the loss of their darling son Noah a few months ago, and have now lost their husband/daddy Aaron to a massive heart attack.
- The Caroll Family, who are praying the Iron Lung will prove to be the solution to their little baby Ry's breathing issues.
- The Thompson Family, struggling with sweet Junior in the hospital.
- The White Family, who's precious daughter Kyana, just had surgery at TCH this week.
- The Mason Family, who is praying and hoping Sophia will rally from her CSF infection, hospitalized at TCH in Houston
SO much heartache, so much love and sadness....Please pray for all our families dealing with loss, illness and fear. Each time we lose a child, all the families shed tears and also experience profound fear for those children we have left. Our ^angel^ families often find themselves reliving their own child's passing. This week has been especially trying and my heart breaks for each and every one of our families. I know Heavenly Father loves us and loves our children. Thank God for Faith!

Where do I begin?

What a week it has been. And not in a good way!  Dear Sophia Faith was home for all of about 14 hours before we were back at the ER with her. She apparently had a shunt infection that started before we were even released from Texas Children's Hospital, but wasn't caught before they let us go home!
She cam home last Thursday and we arrived at the house about 1:30 in the afternoon. It was so good to have her home and the kids were so excited to have her here. Chrissy couldn't stop smiling every time she heard Sophia cry, and Stephen was so happy when he came home from school and she was here. He got to feed her a bottle and sit and cuddle with her. He is such a loving big brother!
She did well for her 6 pm, 9 pm, and midnight feedings. Took all her volume by bottle and I didn't even have to use her ng tube at all!  Then, about 3 am Friday morning, when she woke for her feeding, she seemed very fussy and irritable. She did not want her bottle, and wouldn't tolerate her tube feeding either. She was making a little moaning sound that broke my heart. I sat up with her in the rocking chair and just held her and patted her back til she finally fell back asleep. At 6 am, we were up again, and she still wouldn't take her bottle and she seemed too lethargic to me. I called our pediatrician's office right at 7 am, and they had me bring her in as soon as they opened at 8 am! We were able to see our pediatrician, Dr. Pope, who is wonderful with all my special kiddos!  He looked Sophie over and agreed with my fears that it looked like her shunt was getting infected. I knew it! It was what I suspected from the beginning.
So, back to Texas Children's we went - arrived at the emergency room about 9:30 am Friday morning.  They were pretty quick to get her CT Scan and Shunt series (x-rays) done. All looked normal, but by this time her fontanel was starting to bulge from fluid build up and her eyes were doing that typical "sundowning" that is so common with shunt malfunction. Neurosurgery was called and Dr. Dauser arrived about noon to tap her shunt. He took CSF fluid out and ordered lab work stat. Stat in the emergency room means within a few hours (unfortunately)! So it was sit and wait time. In the meanwhile, Sophie's heart rate was climbing and her respirations were also very high. The emergency room attending physician was very worried and started asking me what we wanted to do should she stop breathing! Yikes! THAT was a scary question!
And why did they even ask?  Because Sophia Faith has Hydranencephaly. So, of course, the question is always asked "do you want to treat her?"  "does she have a DNR?"   "don't you want to just let her go home and have nature take it's course"? 
It is an ongoing struggle for parents of children with Hydranencephaly to get treatment for our kids. Too many doctors still read the one or two paragraphs in a medical textbook about Hydranencephaly and decide our children will have "no quality of life" and they are "terminal". So the question always gets asked. And even when it is answered, it often gets asked again and again and again! It is very frustrating.
Sophia has an infection. If a "normal" child has an infection they are treated. Heck, even a child with other disabilities gets treatment for an infection! So, why do we have to constantly defend our decision to get treatment for our children?
Because the doctor's were so worried that Sophia was declining in the ER, I called birth mom and her mother to come up to the hospital. I felt they should be there if anything went downhill with Sophia Faith or if indeed there were hard decisions to be made. They came right away. Kevin also started up to the hospital.
I talked to Dr. Dauser, and we decided that we would treat Sophia's infection. The treatment would begin with her going back into surgery to have the infected shunt removed. She would then need an external drain (EVD) to keep the excess cerebral spinal fluid at the proper level in her ventricles. She would probably be on antibiotics for 3 to 4 weeks and then a new shunt will be placed. All was decided and once birth mom  got to the ER, we all went upstairs to the surgery suite to prepare for surgery.
It was then that we were forced to endure a HORRIBLE hour long lecture on why we should let our daughter go home to die! Yes,  you heard right!  We had an anesthesiologist (call me for the doctor's name, for those of you who would like to avoid this person in the future) come into our room and actually LECTURE us on futility of care and how he and his wife (a pediatrician) often had discussions on the futile care and the money it cost to provide such care. He pulled up Sophie's CT scan images and proceeded to screech and lecture about her brain being missing and didn't we UNDERSTAND it would not grow back?!?  Didn't we understand she would be intubated for surgery and would never come off the ventilator! When we explained calmly that we did indeed understand all about Hydranencephaly and that we had a daughter who has hydranencephaly, who is now eleven years old, and that we wanted Sophia treated as we had had Chrissy treated in the past, this guy just would not take no for an answer and proceeded to try and pressure birth mom into saying she did not want Sophie treated!  INCREDIBLE!  But I was so proud of birth mom. She stood firm and looked him right in the eyes and said "I want my daughter treated".
Sophie went into surgery about 5:30 pm and was then transferred back up to the NICU, same bed she was in before being released on Thursday. Which was great because we got the same neonatologist and the same team we had before. We love the neonatologist, Dr. George Mandy. He is just wonderful. So patient and caring, and is willing to do the very best for Sophia Faith. And of course, as I expected, she was extubated the following morning with NO PROBLEMS! So much for never coming off the ventilator!

  Sophia has improved somewhat since Friday. She has better color, her blood count is up and the infection has cleared from her blood. She is tolerating her feedings and has not lost weight. But her CSF is still carrying a bad infection and so far the antibiotics are not helping. So today, she received her first intraventricular injection of antibiotics. She is getting her antibiotics directly into her CSF fluid (directly into the ventricles of her brain). The hope is that this will jump start the clearing of the infection in her head and spinal cord. She is still very sick. But she is fighting and trying so hard to be alert and active. The last two days she has been very irritable and fussy, so she has had to have either Chloral Hydrate or Morphine, to settle her down and help her rest.  We can use your prayers, friends!
We so want to bring dear Sophia Faith home! And keep her at home this time!!  She is such a sweetie!

 Tomorrow I will write about the rest of our week and why it was such a hard one! I have many friends in dire need of prayers this week. Praying Heavenly Father stays close to them and to us, as we all face the trials that are upon our families at this time!

Coming Home Soon!

Little Sophie will be coming home on Monday the 16th of January! She is doing well in NICU, despite having some endocrine problems. She has DI (Diabetes Insipidus) and will be coming home with a prescription for DDAVP, which will regulate her sodium levels. Her shunt site is healing well and she looks great! She is just a little fiesty girl! Very active and alert. But so content to just lay in your arms and look up at you! Can't wait to get her home so everyone can enjoy her!!  She is a doll!! 

Birthdays and Angel-versaries (Faith and Hope)

December 26, 2011. Eleven years. Our sweet Christina Ann has celebrated her eleventh birthday!

 Eleven years ago, on December 29, 2000, Kevin and I drove to Temple, Texas to the NICU at Scott and White Hospital, and met our sweet baby girl, Chrissy, for the first time. We heard the doctor tell us that she would die. Soon. Within weeks. She might not even make the three hour trip home to Houston. But despite the doom and gloom, we heard a much louder voice. We heard the voice of our Heavenly Father. And He told us to bring this baby home, love her, and make her a part of our forever family. Who were we to argue?  He had given us everything. He gave us a healthy baby boy and a healthy baby girl, who were the lights of our lives. Andrew was 12 years old, and Katie was 8 years old at that time. Sitting down with the two of them and explaining about this little baby who might come home to us and then die, was a hard thing to do. But they just seemed to understand. Perhaps Heavenly Father's voice spoke to them too. They accepted Chrissy and more importantly, they loved her! For all they were worth, they loved her. Especially Katie, who held and cuddled and loved and loved and loved. Katie probably, more than anybody, loved little Chrissy to LIFE. To this day, Chrissy loves her big sister Katie so much! I don't know if I ever told my kids how much I appreciated them and how much it meant to me, their mother, that they could accept a sibling with special needs and just make her a part of our life without a question or a hesitation! I was and am SO proud of them for their faith and love. 

And now, here we are, ELEVEN years later! I cannot believe how time has gone by so fast. I cannot believe how much Chrissy changed our lives for the better and made us so much more loving and accepting. She opened our hearts to so many possibilities that never existed in our minds before she came. Because of her and her joyous spirit, we have adopted more special needs children. Our lives have been blessed beyond imagining! 

I wrote a poem for Chrissy, back when she was tiny.  I found it in her scrapbook this morning.....I would like to share it here.

God sent an Angel to us

To Stay a Little While....

A Pure and Precious Spirit

A Beautiful Little Child

God Said She Would be Special

Her Heart is Full of Love

Her Eyes Speak of the Warmth

She Brought From Heaven Above

Her Hands are Soft and Gentle

Her Smile Worth More than Gold

One Tender Glance in Your Direction

Gives a Glimpse of the Worth of Her Soul.

How We Love this Precious Angel

How Sweet this Little Child

We Thank Thee for Thy Goodness and Mercy

We Thank Thee for Her Smiles

God Has Surely Blessed Us Greatly

To Share this Gift so Rare

This Pure and Precious Spirit

He has Given from His Care

God, Help Us to Be Worthy

To have her with us Here

That We can make Her Happy

That She will Know No Fear

God, Bless us with the insight

To know just what She needs

To Love Her and to Teach Her

as Her Journey on Earth Proceeds

God, we are so Grateful

in our Family You Placed this Child

For She Shows Us Daily

The Strength of the Meek and Mild.

We Promise to Love Her Greatly

We Promise to Care for Her Well

We promise to Treat Her Gently

In Our Diligence We Will Not Fail.

And When it is Time for Her to Return

to Thy Loving Arms Above

We Promise we will Try to be Ready

To Give Her Back with Our Hearts Full of Love.

Reading those words again, after all these years, has brought home to my heart how much we loved Chrissy then, and how much we love her now. In the years since Chrissy's birth we have also adopted Stephen, in 2002,who is now nine years old, and then adopted our Emily in 2005.  Another precious, sweet spirit, our Emily was brave and strong and true. She was such a breath of fresh air in our lives, and she was so very loved by Chrissy and Stephen, as well as by Andrew, Dana and Katie. Preparing for the return of Chrissy to our Heavenly Father was a pre-occupation of mine, and I worried that I would not be able to "Give Her Back with my Heart Full of Love" when the time came.  

Heavenly Father had a great and awesome, and HARD lesson for me to learn. He had to teach me that it is His Will, Not Mine that is to be done.  On January 3, 2010, I had to learn that lesson. I had to learn it, and then somehow manage to survive it.  For on January 3, 2010, I lost not my Chrissy, but instead my baby Emily was called home. In a horrible, tragic drowning accident, my little light Emily was taken from me and flew away Home to Heavenly Father. She was four years old. I hardly had her for any earthly time at all......and I was NOT ready to let her go! To this day, tears flow frequently, and my heart hurts daily with the loss of Emily. I would gladly die myself to have her here on earth again, bringing her smile and laughter and love to her siblings and daddy. 

But I cannot change God's plan. And I should not. I understand that. Though it hurts like hell, I do understand it.  And I am able to find solace in the fact that I know Emily is with the Lord and is doing important work in Heaven. I am comforted by Chrissy also. I somehow, deep in my heart, understand also that SHE has elected to stay on this earth with all of her disabilities and challenges, so that SHE can comfort her Momma! She is my rock and my fortress. I love her so much! And now my Heart is Full of Love. Because I see her struggles, her love, her courage on a daily basis. Eleven years later, NOW I can say that should Heavenly Father call her Home, I CAN give her back with that Heart Full of Love. My goodness, it would be the LEAST I could do for all she has given me! To know that she was back in Her Heavenly Father's arms, well and healthy and whole, would be the greatest blessing I could ever ask for (for me and for her). 

Of course, I do not think that she will go tomorrow or the next day or the next! I pray for at least ELEVEN MORE YEARS with her! But I know that Heavenly Father loves her and loves me and He will continue to do so for our life times and for our eternities! I am so thankful for that testimony. It has been a long time in the making.    

So, a Birthday on Dec 26th. ELEVEN WONDERFUL YEARS.  Then, an Angel-versary on Jan 3rd. TWO LONG PAINFUL YEARS. Oh, my heart. It struggles with the joy and pain. But a broken heart still beats. It does. It is a different beat. Sometimes weaker, and sometimes stronger. But it is there just the same.  

Three months ago, we were blessed with our little Joshua. He had just barely turned two years old when we brought him home. The blessings of adoption brought forth again for us. Such a treasure, such a comfort, and such a sweet little man ! He is another joyful, happy, spirit. He is blessing our family in many ways already! We are so happy to have him with us now. SO happy that Heavenly Father saw fit to send us our little man! We felt right away that Joshua was meant to be ours. And he has adjusted so well, and loves us as much as we love him. His smiles light my heart! When he says"Mama!" it just makes my love swell!  And he is pretty darn cute too!! 

How can we possibly be any more blessed than we are?  I am finding that it is possible!!  Heavenly Father works in mysterious ways and He is ALWAYS working!  

From the high of Chrissy's birthday on Dec 26th, to the impending low of Emily's Angelversary on Jan 3rd, all the days in between, I found myself wondering how on earth I could go from such joy to such heartache in the space of a few days. There I was, getting all pre-occupied again, with my own thoughts and my own ideas of how things should go.....I found myself pondering my faith and praying for hope in my heart. Hope that I would see my Emily again one day. Hope that Chrissy would stay with us a few more years. And praying hard for the Faith to believe it would be so.

I suppose Heavenly Father got a little tired of me and all my preoccupation. So He decided to give me a whole other thing to PONDER on!  

On December 29, 2011 (yes, just last Thursday), a little baby girl was born here in Houston. She was born with the same condition that Chrissy has. Eleven years almost to the day, here was this little lady with Hydranencephaly. Born and to be placed for adoption. No family to take her. And a birth mother who wanted only the best for her, but is unable to care for her with all her special needs.  No one knew if the baby would even live through her birth. The doctors sure didn't think so. But her birth mother had Faith. Her birth mother gave her a chance!  And she made it! 

As Heavenly Father probably knew all along, she was meant to make it. And I am so thankful to say that Heavenly Father is blessing our family once again, as we are going to be bringing this beautiful baby girl home soon! We have been with her since last Friday. She has gotten her VP Shunt surgery and is doing very well. I have spent many hours at the hospital this week. Her sweet birth mother named her Faith, and with her permission, we have added the name Sophia. So she will be Sophia Faith.  We are thrilled and honored to have been chosen to care for this special, special little girl. Only Heavenly Father knows how long she will be with us. But we hope it will be for a long while!  

Chrissy is over the moon excited!  

So are Stephen and Joshua! (Josh is not quite sure about sharing attention though! LOL)

We are truly thankful this week. I am especially thankful that the Lord saw fit to find me worthy to take care of another of his very special angels. And I was so happy this week, to be able to literally FEEL the presence of my Emily's spirit around me and around Sophie, as we cared for her at the hospital. I have no doubt that my angel Emily girl is watching out for her new baby sister and that she is happy we are taking Sophie into our family. I have no doubt in my heart at all that Families are Forever - eternal units brought together by Heavenly Father. I am thankful for Andrew, Katie, Chrissy, Stephen, Emily, Joshua and Sophie. I am thankful for my husband, Kevin, who has a strong testimony of our Faith and our calling as adoptive parents.   I am just thankful! 

Tired, but THANKFUL!!  

And I have to add......thankful we are done! LOL  Sophie is the last little angel for us!!  She is gonna be one spoiled little baby girl!!!!

                                             THANK YOU HEAVENLY FATHER!!!!